This being Sunday, you might expect I would be writing a post about religion, you would be wrong. Today I am dedicating this space to a friend, without whose help I would not be where I am today. I am sure that what I write will be as much of a surprise to him, if he should read this, as it is to me, that I am writing it. I am just using my fingers to share what is coming from somewhere else. I am not at all sure where this is headed, but you are welcome to come along for the ride.
He and I have been consciously connected in this lifetime since late 2009, when something I wrote on a person's Facebook wall caught his attention and he sent me a friend request. Right from the start the connection was unusually strong, at least from my viewpoint. The first thing that struck me about him was his unique sense of humor and his rather interesting way of expressing himself. He would have stood tall in any crowd.
Also right from the start this, often irritating man, had the unique gift of pushing me to stop "cheating" and learn to use the gift of words I had been given in the most positive way possible; helping myself and in turn helping others grow. I have a vivid memory of a time when he asked me a question and not sure of the answer, I looked it up in a dictionary. His response to that was, "That was the dictionary definition, now what do you think?" What does this guy have eyes in the back of his head or what, I wondered. Right then I knew I would never ever be able to hide anything from him.
At this point I also knew I had already bought into the relationship and there was no way I was going to get out of it. Our communication moved from the public facebook to the more private emails. We had an on again off again relationship for three years, with long periods when I did not physically hear from him. When he did send a message it was like the best Christmas present ever and it didn't have to be December. My heart could not have been happier. When he again left for months my heart felt sad, even though I knew he hadn't really gone far.
During the on periods, brief as they were, his teaching continued, trying to get me to let go of negative thoughts that I had carried with me through my entire life, as the result of my own experiences. His vision/purpose was much better than mine at the time. This is not to say that the man is perfect. He still has a bunch of stuff in his own life to deal with and I believe he knows that or soon will.
Shortly after the first of the year our online relationship suddenly came back to life in full force. Looking back to a few weeks ago, caused my take on that to be, that either I, he or both of us grew to a place where we were ready for the next step. You've heard the expression ready or not here I come? Well I guess I must have said yes because there have been some big changes in my life, mostly in my ability to banish those negative thoughts I have had my whole life, by understanding the underlying causes.
When this enormous shift occurred everything in my life changed. Who I was is no longer who I am and today I am very grateful to my friend, who never gave up pushing me to be me. I do not believe I have ever known a soul more determined to help another and I am eternally grateful that soul happened to be me. Is it any wonder that my heart feels as if it will explode with love whenever he comes into view? Thank you really doesn't cover how I feel right now.