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Thursday, December 31, 2009

An Enlightened Egotist

Today marks the end of 2009 and for me it also marks the end of a 10 year “conscious” journey to evolve my human being from ego based to soul based. Along the way I was assisted by many entities including: friends, relatives, co-workers, brief encounters, a spirit guide, deceased spirits, a Reiki Master and an Archangel or two; all offered by my Creator. I thank you all.
Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of my life- bring it on!

Sunday, December 20, 2009

A True Christmas Story

One Christmas morning several years ago I woke feeling something was missing. It just didn’t seem like Christmas. After breakfast I took a little time for myself before beginning preparations for dinner. I had a few slices of dry bread and decided to take them to the park to give the birds and ducks a holiday treat. It was a very cold and clear morning.

As I began tossing out the breadcrumbs I noticed a young man sitting on a park bench. My immediate reaction was that he was homeless and probably cold and hungry. I continued to feed the birds. As I was leaving the park I couldn’t stop thinking about the young man on the bench. As I started my car I made a decision to try to find some place that was open to get him something hot to drink. I began to drive down the nearly empty main street.

My mission was accomplished when I purchased cappuccino and pastry from a convenience store in the neighborhood. I noted that the total came to $2.01 and probably was not a coincidence. The biblical quote, “what you do unto the least of my brethren you do unto me” kept running through my mind.

Returning to the bench I approached the young man, who was wearing a backpack and appeared to be well kept for a homeless person. I asked if he wanted something hot to drink and he said he did. After setting my offering on the bench I wished him a merry Christmas and he returned the greeting.

A nearby church would soon be having services and I felt that he could find help there if he needed to. After all it was Christmas day!

As I was driving home I recalled reading a story about a minister who had dressed in rags and placed himself outside his church just prior to services. He wanted to see what his congregation would do. They walked right by him. When it was time for the service to begin the minister still in rags, went down the center aisle to the pulpit and used the experience to wake up his congregation.

The life story belonging to the young man on the bench was not for me to know. I believe our meeting was meant to be. I was very happy with the decision I made and I have a feeling that whoever else was watching was too. I found what was missing from my Christmas spirit by following my heart.

Acts of kindness are offerings of love and acknowledgment between one living creature and another. The more we do them, the more we do them without thinking. Giving creates universal love for both the giver and the receiver.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

One Gift

A poem I originally wrote for a Christmas telethon.

If you could have one gift for Christmas
tell me what would it be someone asked.
Seriously pondering the question awhile
the gift I choose wouldn't be under the tree.

What I really want for Christmas
I told the person who had asked me
is the most precious treasured gift of all
LOVE, pure and simple and completely free.

To all who read my words Merry Christmas 2009

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Thoughts To Ponder

Excerpt from my self-published word CD "A Hole in the Middle"

Listen to everything around you. Tune up the volume in your ears and become a universal eavesdropper. You never know when what you hear is a message meant for you. It comes in many forms such as simple conversation, a line from a book or movie, or sitting quietly and listening to birds sing or the movement of the wind.

Look at everything around you. Your vision is meant to see more than what is in front of your eyes. Search for the universal connection, present in every moment. Being aware of that silver thread that binds everything together will always lead you to your next experience.

Evaluate your past and present life challenges on a regular basis. Notice what makes you proud of yourself and what does not. Strive for pride every day of your life and when you don't quite measure up to your personal standard, try harder. You can't change what you did, but you are the only one who has the power to change what you are going to do next.

Appreciate and take care of everything you have been given. Do not compare what you have with what anyone else has. You have everything you need at any given moment of your life. Be aware that anything can disappear in the brink of an eye. When you leave earth you will take what you have learned and nothing more.

Question everything until you are satisfied with the answer. If you feel it is wrong it probably is. Intuition if the universe guiding you. Do not allow anyone else to think or speak for you. You are the only one who is living your life. Do your best and the universe will reward you for your effort.

Acknowledge your pristine soul by staying true to your core values. They have been part of your universal makeup since your soul was created. Do everything possible to keep them clean. Do not get sucked into another's lesser values because of envy, greed, guilt, desperation or laziness.


Saturday, November 28, 2009

Normal people would just...

I gave birth to my third child, my only daughter, when I was 41. Is that normal you might ask? For me, yes. I have always been a little off step from my peers. I was told a former friend of mine chose abortion to end her late pregnancy. I'm not judging her but; I think I made a better choice. It has led to many experiences I would not have otherwise had.

One of the best ways to stay young is to hang out with younger people. I spent so many years as a room mother that I thought I would never get out of the school system. Actually I still help out occasionally because my grandson is in the second grade and my daughter works full time.

Once in a while a comment slips out of her mouth acknowledging the importance of simply being present in a child's life. Those are the times I know that my efforts have been and are appreciated. One day she told me she felt fortunate because, unlike some of her friends, she never came home to an empty house when she was a child.

My little grandson is the one who keeps me young now. We share a special bond that goes way beyond this life. I consider it a privilege to have been chosen as his grandmother and take every opportunity to help him grow. My grandparents provided balance in my life and I am passing on what I was taught to another generation.

Balancing one's life is something learned with age. It did not come easy for me. Today I can be a mother, grandmother, friend, inspirational writer and still have plenty of time for me. It took many years to accomplish this fete. Normal people would probably have learned this lesson much earlier.

I did not grow up in the electronic age, which frustrates my daughter. I still remember when the first TV sets came out. She doesn't understand why I have trouble figuring out simple tasks on my computer. Her favorite expression lately is, "Well normal people would just..."

I decided long ago that I am not normal and I thank God for his creativity. It is fun being a non-conformist in a conformist world. It drives some people crazy because they never know what I am going to do next. Sometimes neither do I!






Monday, November 16, 2009

Alzheimer's

The following is a prose submission published 1994 in NMSU-Grants Branch Inscriptions to honor my mother-in-law, Mary Milan Gunn, deceased 1996.
Between Here and There
Somewhere between here and there lies Mary's mind... Where it briefly rests depends upon the day, the hour, the minute. Eighty-five years of struggling, working, giving and loving tucked away in a golden box with no key for the rest of the world.
Family, lifelong friends, fellow board and committee members, church members, those touched by her existence-astray in the maze of her mind.
Perhaps Mary is better off not understanding the daily happenings of the world, that her friends are no longer alive, that her family finds it unbearable to visit, not recognizing the person before them.
Those who care about the total person know her body needs protection from her mind. They are left to deal with well meaning people who simply do not understand that she needs a safe place.
How sad it is for her body to be here and her mind to be there. If only they could be united once again.




Tuesday, November 10, 2009

"My Man"

This spirit photo is the largest one I have taken. It is hard
to miss the man above the duck's beak.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Quit smoking!

It has been over ten years since I ended a 40 year nicotine addiction. In 2006 I wrote the following article which was published in The Yeah! Times (Youth Empowerment Advocacy Her0es), a program directed at young people in New Mexico.


I Killed My Best Friend

by Barbara L. Gunn

For a variety of reasons I grew up having very little self-esteem. By age19 I was a very lonely person who desperately needed a best friend.

The friend I chose for the next forty years was 3” tall, smelled bad, controlled my life, and led me in the direction of poor health. The relationship was what would be considered abusive today. In the beginning nobody warned me of danger and in all those years no one offered to help me let go of my destructive companion.

There were of course, those who shook their heads and fingers at me making rude comments about how disgusting this relationship was. They probably thought they were helping, but they only made me angry and caused me to stubbornly refuse to let go. This relationship was a stepping stone to years of allowing other people to treat me with disrespect. I had never developed the courage to believe I was worthy o anything more.

One day I looked in the mirror and realized that I did not deserve to be controlled by an object that could not possibly move from my hand to my mouth without my help. I knew I was the only one who could end the relationship and I have never been sorry that I did.

To become self centered and care about yourself is the best way to end any negative addiction. Whoever you are, believe that you are a valuable person who deserves the very best life has to offer. God does not make junk.

Do you really want a best friend who controls your life and is leading you to poor health and perhaps death? If the answer is no- follow my example. Make yourself your best friend and give yourself permission to live the healthy life you were born to experience. You are worth it!

11/7/09

yea! I just took another step on my creative journey.