Resharing a prayer

The Silent Prayer

In my heart I accept my perfect Being.
I accept that the joy I have intended is already in my life.
I accept that love I have prayed for is already within me.
I accept that the peace I have asked for is already my reality.

In my truth, I accept my perfect Being.
I take responsibility for my own creations.
And all things that are within my life.
I acknowledge the power of spirit that is within me,
And know that all things are as they should be.

In my wisdom, I accept my perfect Being.
My lessons have been carefully chosen by my self,
And now I walk through them in full experience.
My path takes me on a sacred journey with divine purpose.
My experiences become part of all that is.

In my knowingness, I accept my perfect Being.
In this moment, I sit in my golden chair
And know that I Am an angel of light.
I look upon the golden tray-the gift of spirit-
And know that all of my desires have already been fulfilled.

In love for my self, I accept my perfect Being.
I cast no judgment or burdens upon my self.
I accept that everything in my past was given in love.
I accept that everything in this moment comes from love.
I accept that everything in my future will result in greater love.

In my Being, I accept my perfection.
And so it is.

~author unknown

Don't I count?

There seems to be a short circuit between the human me and the powers that be.

Sometimes I wonder if I have become invisible to God/Source. No, I don't think so because I can still see me in my mirror. What I see is someone who has spent her life giving whatever she could to others, even when she didn't have it to give. I am willing to admit that sometimes those gifts were given to buy love from others and I now know it was a form of manipulation. Live and learn . That was then and this is now and I have nothing left to give to anyone.

Taking care of myself all by myself since my divorce in 1999 has been an expensive journey. I went down a lot of dead end roads trying to discover what it is that I am supposed to be doing with my life. I have survived many trials that by comparison to some may not seem all that important. To me they were major tests to see if I could manage without giving up. So far I haven't reached that point, but I am getting close.

I have almost used up the monetary funds that I earned for my desire to be free from living with a mentally abusive alcoholic husband for 27 years. If I had not wasted so much on others I would be in better shape today, but I can't get back what I gave away. What's funny is that many of those people, including my own family, see me struggling and don't care. These are the people I picked for my life lessons? I'd like to have a do over God!

I spent years standing on the cement floors at Walmart for 6 hours straight offering samples to customers for not much money. It is no doubt partly the cause of my current back problems, creating yet more expense. Along with that I was just told by my physical therapist that my willingness to have another child at 41 probably contributed to the pain I am now enduring. It seems giving life to another can be expensive, especially when that person isn't even grateful for the gift.

I have written books and taken beautiful photographs that I am not able to sell. I'm sure you have heard the saying, it takes money to make money. That about sums up that story. Again, if I had the money for what I have given away over the years I would have fewer money problems now.

I see many of my friends moving to better homes, taking trips, given money and gifts, adding loving mates and I am happy for them. Although I am not jealous I am asking God/Source, don't I count? I have played by the rules and have learned to take care of myself, but the way I am being treated is unacceptable.

So today I am asking anyone who has an extra prayer and a direct line to the powers that be to speak for me. Apparently I am experiencing a short circuit.

Sinners or saints

I have about had it with the world. Wake up people can't you see that you are making the wrong people role models for your children and teenagers? You continue to idealize celebrities strutting on their elevated stages, abusing their god given gifts. You raise them even higher when their addictions to drugs and alcohol finally do them in. Oh the poor misunderstood beings!

Poor my ass! They had so much money that they could have afforded any help available anywhere in the world, no matter how much it cost. In my opinion they could all have used a very large mirror to see who they really were beneath all the phony armor they hid behind. They lived their lives like they were so big nothing bad would ever touch them. Every child left behind by these bigger than life celebrities has suffered with their own scars as a result.

Not one person in this entire universe is better than anyone else, no matter how much talent they have or how important they and their followers think they are.

We all come here with a message. Perhaps the message the celebrities who are not grateful for what they have been given and abuse their gifts is: if you follow me this could happen to you.

Be very careful who you make a saint, because there are children watching and listening and following.

Spirit photography

Since about 2000 I have been taking photos with the images of spirits in them. I still remember the first one that I took. I had a difficult time digesting what I saw in the picture. Since that time the images appear whenever they desire to do so. I do not solicit them and many times I am not aware of their presence until the photo is developed.

Most of the time I have no idea who the spirit is. I never ever refer to them as ghosts. They are as real as you and me and simply no longer live in a human body on earth. I believe I was given this unusual gift of seeing images in pictures to act as a messenger to convince non believers that we do not die. Our soul is eternal and is simply transmuted to another form when we leave here.

This last weekend I felt a strong awareness of spirit energy around me. Sunday morning I looked out my office window and a wave of unusual clouds came into view over the mesa. I didn't hesitate to grab my camera and snap a picture. There was something about the clouds that said this is for you. It was not until I transferred the picture to my computer that I realized what I had captured. It was the sad eyes and face of a very powerful female. She was the second largest image I have taken so far. The first was a male who appeared in a body of water in our local park several years ago. I have "My Man" hung in my living room because he is so amazing.

I guess I should come up with an appropriate name for the latest addition to my spirit gallery. I'm leaning toward "The Lady Speaks". For your enjoyment I am posting both photos, ladies first!

THE LADY SPEAKS

MY MAN

Right brain go...

After choosing fear as a word prompt I became aware that the fear of having fun is something that has been interfering with my life for years and I decided to track down its roots so that I can be done with it once and for all.

I began by going back in my life as far as I could. I checked out old photos and noted that until I was about two I was smiling. Then the photos began portraying a child with an unhappy expression on her face. I surmised there had to have been some kind of serious trauma that occurred, but what that was I wasn’t quite sure.

At first I blamed the fact that my brother came along when I was only 13 months old disrupting my role as my parent’s only child. I spent most of my childhood switching between resenting his intrusion and feeling responsible for him. I believe I wrongly assumed the role of a grownup long before I should have.

As if that were not trauma enough, I had major surgery when I was about 6. I overheard nurses saying they didn’t believe I would survive. I clearly remember being left alone on a gurney outside of the operating room and later the doctor yelling at the technicians because I wasn’t asleep yet. I also remember being complimented for bravely putting up with the numerous penicillin shots that were keeping me free from infection.

After that experience I don’t recall having much fun doing anything. I went to school, joined groups, took dance lessons, graduated from high school, got married twice, had 3 kids and my life went on in a very ordinary sort of way. I continued to focus on those I felt responsible for until 1999 when my thoughts began changing who I was and who I wanted to be. I began systematically dumping negative things from my life, including people.

It was not until I ran across a website just last week that I finally put the pieces together and realized what has been happening for the last 12 years. It has to do with the right and left brain and the functions of each.

The left brain is scientific, accurate, analytical, realistic, strategic, a master of words, logical, practical and always in control. If that doesn’t describe who I was back then I don’t know what does. No wonder I had trouble having fun.

The right brain is creative, a free spirit, passionate, boundless imagination, the sound of laughter, taste, movement, vivid colors, an urge to paint on an empty canvas, the feeling of sand beneath bare feet, art, poetry and a feeling of wholeness. Ah that’s much better.

I now believe that without my conscious knowledge I have been slowly guided to give my right brain permission to work in harmony with my left brain, allowing the person I was created to be to become whole again. Fear of having fun is no longer necessary.

Money isn't everything

This month I have had to make several decisions involving money that have reminded me that, although important for survival, money isn't everything.

Last weekend I was still getting calls from people who saw my advertisement in the newspaper and were interested in buying my house. Sorry people it is no longer for sale. Even with its flaws it's mine and I am keeping it. It makes me happy to live in a home that belongs to me.

Next I answered an ad for weekend work as a product demonstrator at a local grocery store. All the paper work is completed and I just received my official ID card. I am ready to start raking in that extra money, even though I thought I had retired in 2007. I am now standing at the starting line waiting for someone to blow the whistle. Something seems to be holding up my first assignment, but I can't put my finger on it. Another lesson in patience or trust perhaps?

Some of you may remember that I had to buy a new furnace recently. It turned out to be a major purchase that I temporarily put on my credit card. I wanted to buy some time to decide exactly how I wanted to pay for it. That didn't work out as planned because the bill just arrived. I had only been given two weeks to decide if I wanted to drag it on or just write a check for the total amount. I spent some time thinking about the situation. I realized I was not willing to pay one cent more than the bill I had received for the furnace, even though the amount would seriously deplete my savings. Then I had to laugh when I reminded myself that the money was there to take care of emergencies and heating my house qualified. Yesterday I wrote and mailed the check and it made me very happy.

Last week I responded to another ad for part time work, also at our local grocery store. I had a phone interview and was told the job was for 32 hours per week. The company desperately needed a person a.s.a.p. I was emailed 13 documents to read and asked to return the portions that were needed. After checking them out and deciding that 32 hours was more than I wanted I said no to the job offer. I had carefully weighed the pros and cons of what I would have to give up to accept the job. Even though the money would have more than doubled my current income and allowed me to replace what has gone out in unexpected bills in the last few months, It wasn't worth it. It was a tough decision because that potential clinking of coins had a really nice sound. I knew that in a short time this job would cause so much stress that I would want to quit. It simply wasn't meant for me.

Since making that decision, I am wondering if it is going to be my only chance to increase my income. Did I make the universe angry, by not accepting what was offered? I keep thinking of all those jokes about God offering to help and people just not accepting what was obvious. Is that what just happened? I have concluded the answer is no. There is another word that should be added to this story and that is trust. I believe that God/Source has something better in mind for me now that I have learned that money isn't everything.

A moment of your time

I always try to share the knowledge and tidbits that come into my life with my readers, believing that is part of the reason I have the information in the first place. Today I am asking for a moment of your time to help me identify 3 pieces of very heavy glass serving dishes that have been in my possession for many years. I have been told by a couple of people that they are perhaps from around 1920-1930 and possibly are Pfaltzgraff ware. I have found no marking on any of the pieces.

fish platter measures 11"x15"

divided serving platter measures 12"x11"

shell bowl measures 11"

Please comment if you have information on the vintage or value of these pieces. Thank you for this moment of your time.