Color

Color seems to be an important factor in the world today. In my family it isn't a big deal. My youngest child, my grandchildren and my great-grandchildren all have a percentage of Native American blood in their veins. My grandson-in-law is also African American, making my two oldest great grandchildren more than a little bit bi-racial. In case you lost track, that's Native American, African American and Anglo.

I was just thinking about the important people in my life and realized that both my chiropractor and cardiologist are of black ancestry, All that matters to me is those little letters that go after their names.

Because of social media I have friends all over the world. I care about what kind of friends they are, not what color their skin is.

Growing up in the State of Washington, my first experience with a person of color didn't happen until I was a new mother in Seattle. My in laws had a repairman who was black. To this day I can recall his coming to my house to get a peek at the child I had given birth to. I find it odd that after sixty years, that his name, which was Clarence, just popped up in my mind.

New Mexico has been called a melting pot of nationalities. I am surrounded by it. I have been thinking about why our State has so many positive virus cases and deaths among Native Americans. I believe it is due to how they live, not because of their skin color. Do you really think the Creator has it in for people with different skin tones? Seriously?!



  

  

Truth or fiction

Everybody is talking about whether or not Michele Lujan Grisham, the Governor of New Mexico, violated the close down orders for businesses. Personally I don't care where or how she purchased her last wad of silver jewelry.

What I do care about is her practice of wearing her very expensive jewelry during her weekly press conferences. In a relatively poor state, where a multitude of people are without incomes, due to her orders, I believe it shows very poor taste.

She needs to get real and come down off her pedestal. Join the rest of the people you represent Ms. Grisham and keep your expensive purchases where they belong- at home.

An inch or a mile

After viewing the recent pictures of people taking advantage of the various rules for safety being relaxed the quote, give an inch and they will take a mile, came to mind. What in the world is wrong with people?

Just when the air and waters are beginning to heal from abuse, people are once again leaving their trash everywhere. I'm not lumping everyone in that group, but there are enough to get us right back where we started from.

The pictures of beaches opening and the idiots ignoring social distance rules make me angry. Every single one of those jerks can spread the virus to family, friends or casual contacts. There is a virus out there looking for people to infect.What is wrong with people?

I am happy that I live in a small town with people who pretty much follow the rules. Wear a mask in public places and keep your distance. This has nothing to do with fear. It is just common sense.

   

A reminder

A friend's Facebook post today reminded me that it has been 21 years since I ended a smoking habit. That's a long time.I remember my then husband telling someone, "she quit smoking and changed". He was right about that. It wasn't long before I began wiping out all my negative habits.

So today, along with my friend who is celebrating 13 years of sobriety, I also celebrate a positive decision in my life. I would also like to share something I wrote several years ago to wake others up.

            I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND

For a variety of reasons I grew up having very little self-esteem. When I graduated from high school I had no clue what I was supposed to do with the rest of my life. I had been an average student who finished school because it was expected. At 19 I was a very lonely person who desperately needed a best friend.

The friend I choose for the next forty years was three inches tall, smelled bad, controlled my life and led me in the direction of poor health. The relationship was what would be considered abusive today. At the beginning no one warned me of danger and in all those years nobody offered to help me let go of my destructive companion.

There were of course, those who shook their heads and fingers at me making rude comments about how disgusting this relationship was. They probably thought they were helping, but they only made me angry and caused me to stubbornly refuse to let go.

When I was 62 years old I looked in the mirror and did not like what I saw. I decided I did not deserve to be controlled by an object that could not possibly move from my hand to my mouth without my help. I realized I was the only one who could end the relationship and I have never been sorry that I did.

Believe me when I say, the only way you will successfully stop smoking or any other negative addiction is to become self centered and care about yourself. Whoever you are, believe that you are a valuable person who deserves the very best life has to offer.

There are many people around you who want to help. The hardest thing you have to do is learn to care about yourself and be willing to accept their help. I know from personal experience that once you do that the rest is a breeze.

Do you really want a best friend who is three inches tall, smells bad, controls your life and is leading you in the direction of poor health and perhaps death? If the answer is no, follow my example and give yourself permission to live the healthy life you deserve.

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The good virus

On this Memorial Day weekend I am thinking about my maternal grandfather, William Ott Johnston, who died because of the 1918 pandemic. Yes he was a soldier, but never served in a war. I never knew him in this lifetime, but wish I had.

I find it interesting that after all these years I am also living in a pandemic. 

I don’t think the current virus is all bad. It has eliminated all other deaths, including heart attacks, cancer, diabetes etc. Well that’s what the current death information indicates anyway. Believe what you will! 

It has eliminated all terrorist attacks on schools and large gatherings, such as concerts.

It is keeping the air cleaner because there are less vehicles and planes on the ground and in the air. Animals, birds and fish can breath freely. Beaches are cleaner because humans have been banned from using them. That could change soon- oh no!

Humans have been forced to go back to depending on themselves for what they need to survive. It has allowed people to remember that they are creative and don’t need half of the junk they have accumulated in the first place.

It has revealed the true nature of our leaders, just in time for another general election! Think about that why don’t you!

I am actually finding it interesting to live through another pandemic. I am doing everything possible to stay away from the virus, but if I end up joining my grandfather, so be it.

A smart virus

I have been laughing at something I read for the last hour and I can't resist commenting on it. The quote was, "Imagine a virus so intelligent it knows the difference between a grocery store and a bar or restaurant." Seriously that is what the experts are trying to get us to believe.

Te quote reminded me that last week I took my dog to the groomers for a haircut, but I can't go to a beauty salon to get my hair cut. They both involve a small building with two people present, the client and the person with the shears.

This whole thing is getting so out of hand and is just plain stupid. If everyone wore a mask and did their best to stay apart what difference does it make what transpires? I can see limiting the number of customers, that just makes sense. I am getting sick of these so called experts telling us what we can and can't do. 

Doing my part

Next week I will be doing my part to help a local business. Garcia's Services will be installing a new roof over my 20'x20' addition. Apparently it is unusual for a tin roof to last 40 years. Having a real roof over the room will certainly keep the noise down when it rains. My deceased father-in-law built the addition to my double wide mobile home in 1980, when we moved it from New Laguna to Grants, NM . He must have done a good job to have things last so long.

Because of the pandemic, Sammy Garcia and his crew have not been as busy as usual, so I am happy that he found time to do this job for me. A few months ago he put a new roof on my house. I have always been very happy with the professional work he does and the fact that he stands behind it.

The price is right

I have been putting off appointments because I didn't think it was safe to make them. This week I decided it was time.

First my dog had been scratching like mad and I knew it was from an allergy of some kind. I made an appointment to have him groomed, expecting a bath and haircut would eliminate the problem. Wrong! After much hesitation I called his vet to make an appointment. He was due for a parvo vaccination anyway. I was impressed with the way they handled clients. Only one went in the building at a time. Ejay was taken care of and it cost me about $100 less then last year for about the same problem. He is now allergy free thank goodness. No more scratching!

I had also been putting off a chiropractic appointment for myself for the same reason. After listening to the Governor I wasn't sure it was safe. I gave in this morning due to a flare up of something I had been previously treated for. It wasn't getting better. Again I was impressed with the precautions for patient safety that were being used. I had expected to pay the regular price, but because it was a flare up most of the bill will be paid by Medicare. That was a surprise!

Hopefully both my dog and I will both be doing much better now and the price was right for once!

What if?

Yesterday I came up with the thought, what if the current vice president became the president? The question materialized after I decided I had no intention of voting for Trump or Biden. In my opinion, they are both first class idiots. How anyone could vote for either one is beyond me. Getting them out of the way for a moment I asked myself is there anyone who has enough intelligence to actually be the president? In my opinion remember. The only person I could see would be Mike Pence, the current vice president.

That thought led me to check out how many vice presidents became president "accidentally". By that I mean because of the death of the president. Wow the number is eight. Some of the presidents died of natural causes some were assassinated. An interesting bit of information to chew on!

The only way Pence could assume the role of president is if the election took place in November, Trump won and suddenly died, either before or after taking the oath of office. Who would be next in line? Yup!

Oddly, after I had these thoughts yesterday I saw the clip of our current president admitting he is taking the drug, hydroxychloroquine, to avoid getting the virus. Medical professionals have said he should not be taking it. It has serious side effects and it could be fatal. Of course, he believes he is immune, being the king and all!

Time will tell if my fantasy becomes real or not. I am not psychic, well not much anyway. November isn't that far off.

Acceptance

Thinking things over this morning caused me to come to only one conclusion- acceptance.

First of all I am grateful that I have a visual record of my youngest grandson receiving his diploma from this high school principal. My three children graduated from the same high school and I have no proof. I also did not have an up close view of their reactions when they were handed that special piece of paper, declaring that they had completed twelve years of school.

Since the Governor has included Cibola County in the high risk portion of the State we are in the preparation phase of her orders and have have not yet been allowed to move to phase one. That's fine we can all just sit back and watch what happens to the rest of the State, as she opens things up. All we can do is accept her orders.

Trying to figure why this is happening or where it is going is a waste of time. It is what it is and all I can do is make the best of it. Is that fun? No it isn't! My current job is to keep my house clean, create nourishing meals and follow the rules of wearing a mask and social distancing. It is also my job to find things to occupy my time that allow me to have a little fun. Apparently that's where my writing comes in. Oh and those weeds growing in my yard are also calling my name!  

What now?

Grants High School pulled off their drive through graduation and now the 170 graduates have their diplomas. I am wondering what now?

Those headed for college can't go because the schools are closed and there is some doubt that they will open in the fall. They can't move out because there is no place for them to go. They most likely won't be able to get a job because there is already a record number unemployed. They are pretty much stuck right where they are, at least for the time being.

Although I am happy that the school was able to have a virtual graduation, there is one thing that causes me to be concerned. The original plan was to have one student plus a driver, if necessary, in each car. They ended up allowing as many occupants in each car as it could hold. I thought that was a really bad idea and I pray that it does not raise the virus count for our town.

Like everyone else, I will just have to sit back and wait for what now?

A new way

Things are changing to put it mildly! My youngest grandson will be officially graduating from high school tomorrow. The staff has it all figured out to keep it safe for all concerned. The graduates will be walking on a stage- one by one. They will receive their diplomas from staff, of course wearing a mask. The only difference is that they will be driving to and from the stage in cars, coming from four different parking areas on the school grounds. Whoever thought this out, is a genius! I for one am very happy that this will take place. The class of 2020 has already been through enough and they deserve this!

Congratulations to my grandson, Colin Chace Stoughtenger and the rest of his graduating classmates!

Once again

Another Mother's Day has rolled around again. I reminds me that two of my three children do not even care to acknowledge me. That's disturbing considering all the opportunities I took to make sure they grew up to be adults. On my friends podcast this morning one of the first thoughts I grasped was, it is not what you get that matters, it is what you give.I suppose that is right. If you have done the best that you could in any situation that is all that is required of you.

So as another Mother's Day rolls around I believe I did the best that I could and if my children do not appreciate that, it is their problem. They did not live my life or face the challenges that I faced to make sure they grew up safe and whole.

Happy Mother's Day

What an interesting holiday Mother's Day is. I wonder who it was that chose one day out 365 to honor the person responsible for carrying a child for nine months so that it could experience life. It seems to me that mothers take the rap for everything that ever happens to a child for the rest of its natural life. That certainly gives them a lot of power that I don't think the Creator intended them to have!

Most mothers never get it right according to the majority of their children. They either over or under protect. God help them if they don't do things the way the child thinks they should. Adult children make wonderful judges, even though they don't get paid for the job. But they are paid back when they have children of their own, sometimes overpaid! Isn't karma a wonderful thing?

So on this Mother's Day 2020 I wish all mothers a wonderful day, especially for those mothers whose children don't. Remember, there is one entity who knows the whole truth.

No way!

At 82 years old I decided today that I am absolutely not going to leave this world until this pandemic is over! My death certificate is going to be truthful not a false statistic! If I am going to move on to another place it is going to be because I got hit by a car, fell out of an airplane or ate a poisonous apple. I might consider a heart attack, but I will not accept corona-virus as a reason for my no longer being here.

Are you listening?

I had a very disappointing experience this morning. My friend,who is a minister, and his wife offered a program on Facebook on the topic of soulmates. I was really interested in what they would say because I suggested the topic. Unfortunately, there was no sound so I and everyone watching had no idea of what they were saying. It made me very sad and I have hopes that they will try again.

Years ago when I first tuned into the spiritual world a local friend and I were talking about this very subject. Her opinion was that a soulmate was a soul that was created at the same time that yours was. They are the souls closest to you and stay with you forever. That made perfect sense to me at the time. I imagine our soulmates are also referred to as members of our tribe.

I believe soulmates come back into each life that we live as humans. Their job is to help us grow spiritually. Each life is different and our soulmates take on different roles. In one life they could be a parent, a child, a partner or simply a friend, depending on what is needed.

In doing some research on the subject of soulmates I also came across twin flame soulmates. These are very special souls and rarely live as humans at the same time. I personally believe that I have had an encounter with my twin flame soulmate, who is now deceased.

Some people believe that soulmates are sort of joined at the hip and think exactly alike. I believe that is wrong. How could anyone learn from a mirror image? It has been my experience that they quite often can be complete opposites. They provide the best tool we have for learning and growing.

Personally I am grateful for my soulmates and for what they have taught me. I am hopeful that the muted program from my friend will be repaired and offered again. In the meantime, these are my thoughts on the subject of soulmates. 

Teachers

During the last twenty years I have had many teachers, but two stand out in my mind. They were both males and oddly were both born in 1942, five years after my birth. They had many things in common and they both inspired my spiritual growth. During the years I knew them they both caused me to express anger at one time or another. They were not exactly road blocks to my future but they made me stop and think about where I was going. Today I am grateful to have had the experiences they brought me. Both men came from backgrounds that I new nothing about and were the best teachers I could have had.

In thinking back to those experiences I am asking myself what did I learn from them? I think both men were put into my life to teach me to believe in myself, to stand up for myself and stop living my life as a sheep. I learned to accept new ideas and to express them through writing. Coming from a family that did not offer a whole lot of support, that was not an easy lesson to learn.

As I have previously stated, teachers come in all shapes and sizes we just need to be willing to learn from them. 

Sharing is caring

Last night my son made a ton of a new recipe for macaroni & cheese on the grill. As we were having dinner I thought, who could I share this with? Then I thought of a neighbor who doesn't cook much anymore. I decided to call and ask if she would like some. She said yes and asked if I liked rhubarb. When I said yes we decided to share.

She later came to my house to make the exchange. Although she was standing on my front porch I don't think either of us had any thoughts about the current virus. We were just two friends sharing and caring about each other.

In this time of struggle I think sometimes you just have to depend on your own mind and heart and trust that what you are doing is right, whatever anyone else says.

New thought

Something came through on Facebook that really got my attention. It was in part: "You are in the middle of the greatest shift that humanity has ever witnessed." And I am!

It made me ask why me?

For some time I have thought it a little odd that I have outlived most of my family, including first cousins, a brother, parents and even two ex-husbands. I am still here in reasonably good health. I also wonder if it was an accident that I became a writer. Maybe not. Maybe that is exactly what I was supposed to do. A new friend who is a Buddhist said the best way to live is to be an observer. He may be right, but someone has to keep records, if for no one else, his/her family members.

I also think it is extremely odd that I was the one who ended up with the family bible, belonging to my maternal great grandmother. Again, why me?

I wish someone would tell me what I am supposed to do now.

Hiding from the virus reminds me of the story of Anne Frank, recorded in her diary. She and her family hid in a small space for two years to avoid Nazi persecution. Much like today, their situation was a matter of life and death.

Until further notice I will just go on writing down what is happening in my environment and trying to follow the rules for social distancing etc. Perhaps someday someone will benefit from my efforts to record my history.