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Thursday, May 6, 2010

Lunch With a Friend

I never thought a simple lunch in my favorite Chinese restaurant could open my eyes to see that I really have moved on with my life. On top of that the buffet was absolutely delicious, especially the steamed shrimp, not as yet affected by the gulf oil spill. Living in a desert town has its benefits. Our seafood mostly comes frozen.

My lunch partner was a female friend who detests living here. She is trying to sell her house so she can move to Texas and be near her grown children. The woman has accumulated a major amount of negative energy throughout her life and has never found a way to deal with it. It just keeps building up like a giant pile of Lego blocks.

Over the past few months I have tried to help her by suggesting things she could do to help herself. I have often reminded her “I can’t do it for you”. Noticing that my life had changed dramatically from when we first met a few years ago, she slowly began to listen to me. She asked me how I obtained my knowledge and I told her books, the internet and just plain paying attention to what is going on around me.

I recently loaned her a copy of a book written in such simple language anyone could understand it. Hey it even has large print! At lunch today she returned the book. I asked her if she had learned anything from her reading. Her answer amazed me. She said, “I got a lot out of the book and made copies of most of the pages, but I haven’t applied it to my life yet.” With great restraint I said nothing. I wanted to yell WHAT! It just goes to show you can lead a horse to water but, you can’t make it drink.

The crowning comment came at the end of our meal, when she suggested that if my daughter (age 30) and my grandson ever moved away I should move with them. My reply was why? I am not tied to my daughter. Then it dawned on that the biggest difference between my friend and I is her family totally consists of her grown children and grandchildren. My family consists of the entire universe. That realization was more than worth the price of lunch!


  1. Excellent realization, Barbara!

    Sometimes people get "too attached" to their nuclear family, when we are all one.

  2. Thank you. I think sometimes our biological family can hold us back, without meaning to, of course.