The positive path of grandparents

One of my friends recently asked me a question that caught my attention. It was, what is your favorite childhood memory? It took me some time before I came up with an answer, which was spending time with my grandparents.

Her reply was, “I can feel your love for them.”

My maternal grandparents, better known as Nana and Pappy, were the people who taught me the basic values that I still follow today. I have a great deal of respect for both of them. My younger brother and I spent many summers under their roof. 

I was taught the Lord’s Prayer by my grandmother. She also made sure I had piano and dance lessons and generally made me feel special. I loved helping her in the kitchen. She may have been the one who instilled my current enjoyment of trying new recipes. I especially remember her rhubarb pies and applesauce. Even today when I am peeling hard boiled eggs I can hear her saying, “Don’t crack them too much or you won’t be able to peel the shell off.” I have a vivid memory of sitting with her and snapping green beans from their garden.

One of my jobs while staying with them was dusting her Hummel collection. That is where I learned “a place for everything and everything in its place”. It is something I still follow today. Clutter drives me crazy.

There were always flowers in their yard, especially roses, which today are my favorite. My grandfather brought my grandmother a cut rose every morning that they were blooming. It sat in a crystal vase in the center of the dining room table. I think that led me to the belief that a single rose says so much more than an entire bouquet. 

Another very strong memory also involved my grandfather and flowers. It occurred when I was a teenager. We lived in opposite ends of town. One day he picked me up in his vehicle because we were going to attend an event together later that night. On the way to his house he stopped his truck and got out without saying a word. I was not familiar with the area we were in. A few minutes later he came back and presented me with a box that contained a corsage. He didn’t say anything, but he didn’t have to. It was just the kind of man he was.

My grandmother always had a lot of friends and she enjoyed inviting them to her home to play bingo. I got to play too, but there was one rule; I wasn’t allowed to win a prize. At the time, I didn’t think that was very fair, but as an adult I see that life always has rules. If you don’t follow them you can find yourself in a whole lot of trouble.

One of my fondest memories is sitting next to my grandmother, unwinding the yarn as she created projects to give away. I believe the activity woke up my creative genes. As an adult, I taught myself how to crochet and today enjoy making baby blankets and little beanies to donate to our local hospital maternity ward. I often think how proud my grandmother would be of my gesture.
 

I don’t recall my grandmother being critical of anything I did. Well, that’s not entirely true. She had a problem with my penmanship. Although I have tried over the years to improve, it has been a wasted effort. That is why I am grateful for the invention of the computer. 

Another memory that has lasted a lifetime is, one day I was sitting in the back of my grandparents’ car complaining about something someone did or said to me. I blurted out, “I hate her!” My grandmother turned around and sternly said, “You don’t hate anyone!” I don’t think I ever used those words again. 

A very important grandparent memory is that of my first marriage. My parents did not approve of my choice of partners and chose not to have any part of my wedding. Nana and Pappy came to the rescue. My grandmother found a dress and had it altered to fit me. My grandfather walked me down the aisle and they paid for the modest ceremony. They may not have approved of my choice of a husband either, but they did not say a word about that fact.

My first child was born on Christmas day 1960. My grandparents gave me a choice of having a nurse or diaper service for a month. I chose the latter because I didn’t have a washing machine. When my son was about a month old he had a very bad chest cold. My grandmother stopped by with several pairs of booties she had knitted. She offered with confidence, “When a baby’s feet are cold it affects their whole body.” She never for a moment suggested that his health problem was my fault.

Neither of my grandparents are alive now, but the values they taught me growing up have lasted all my life. I believe they are the reason I have had such a positive relationship with my young grandson. I have always tried to look for and encourage any signs I have noticed for his special talents. I sincerely hope I have been to him the kind of grandparent my grandparents were to me. Only once in his seventeen years on this planet did I raise my voice to him. That was simply to remind him how important it is to always do what he promises to do. I believe my grandparents would have done the same thing. 

I inherited an antique rocking chair that my grandfather gave me when I was a young mother and my grandmother’s collection of Hummel figurines that I dusted as a child. They keep my memories alive. I wouldn’t sell them for any amount of money.

So it seems my answer to my friend’s question was correct. My favorite childhood memory is spending time with my grandparents. I wouldn’t be a bit surprised if they were still in my life, acting as my spirit guides.