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Saturday, February 11, 2017

A grape, an orange and a life

Everyone at some point compares who they are with someone else. I think age and possibly gender determines who that will be. It could be a parent, grandparent, sibling, child, friend, teacher and the list goes on and on. It is like comparing a grape and an orange. They are both edible fruit but that's about it.

We get ourselves into so much trouble comparing our life to other lives. No two people ever have the same experiences or even see things the same way. It just is not possible.

I often think of my oldest grandchildren who were born identical twins. Their birth was by C-section so obviously one was removed from the womb before the other. One went home with parents while the other remained in a hospital incubator, waiting to gain weight. From the very first day of their lives their experiences were totally different. At one time it was difficult to tell them apart, but as they reached adulthood that changed dramatically. Today their lives are totally different and it is sometimes difficult for me to remember that they are twins.

We are all given our own life to live and it really is ridicules to compare it to anyone else's life.

A couple of years ago I acquired a new female friend whose life experiences seemed very close to mine. It was a little eerie at times. I got into the bad habit of believing that because something was going on in her life it compared to something going on in mine. I would check with her before making important decisions. Lately my vision has improved and I can clearly see that I am perfectly capable of making my own decisions. It is easy to get caught up in believing that someone else is better at living our life than we are.

Many times I have temporarily been sucked into comparing myself to another. I have allowed this comparison to cause me to feel less than and at times even stupid. I once wrote "God doesn't make junk". I keep forgetting that simple quote.

Forty years of my life were spent allowing husbands to live my life for me. I suppose it wasn't a waste of time because the two marriages produced three children who produced four children, who have produced two and a half more. (One is on the way.)

Each was born with the ability to be a whole being who does not need to be compared to anyone else, living or dead. 

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