It seems I just experienced another lesson making sure that I have finally learned to put myself first and stop taking responsibility for things that are not my problem.
Lately I have been thinking that I wanted a dog. I even pictured him to be light in color and about the size of a cocker spaniel. My very first dog as a child was a cocker named Skippy because he was the color of peanut butter. He died of some kind of disease he got after being picked up by the dog pound.
Last week after talking with a friend I stopped by the animal shelter and saw the dog I had pictured. He is about a year old and his previous owner had not come to get him in 3 weeks. He is a beautiful little guy and was the only dog in lock up who caught my attention. I thought about it for awhile and went back the next day to see if he was still there. He was and I was told I could take him home over the weekend to see how he would fit into my life. I was very grateful for the opportunity because the fee for adoption is $69 and is non-refundable.
Generally speaking the dog is lovable, calm and best of all housebroken. My first problem after bringing him home was that I have two cats, 7 and 8 years old, that I have had since they were kittens. Mine is the only home they have ever known. Trouble began with the very first sight of a dog in their house. The female is afraid of him and the dog is afraid of the male who has attacked several times for no apparent reason.
Another major problem is that I have to keep my driveway gate closed whenever the dog is outside. If I need to go to town I have to open and close it before letting the dog out. it is very frustrating. I haven't had to do this since about 2000, when I had another dog.
This afternoon I noticed that I was feeling very stressed and I put my finger on the cause when I realized that every time I moved the dog was under my feet. I am sure that eventually I will trip over him, fall and probably break a bone or two. As much as I would like to keep him what this little fellow really needs is to be pared with a family who has a kid eager to play with him.
This time I really have to put myself first and return him to the shelter tomorrow. I was beginning to feel guilty until I realized I am through taking responsibility for things that are not my fault. I really hope a nice family looking for an adorable ball of fur will choose him to take home with them.