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Thursday, July 21, 2016

Family ties

Can you grow up without family ties? Yes you can but it can be a lonely place out there.

Sometimes I wonder why I was cheated out of family. My mother was an only child, my father had 3 siblings who had between them several children and I had one brother. Our family was not close. Even my brother, who was 13 months younger than I am and died in 2011, was not close.

I grew up thinking it was my job to keep my remaining family together. It has only been recently that I realized that was never true. Like many others it was a job I assumed because I was in desperate need of a family who cared. Even my three grown children barely communicate unless they want something from the other. Again, I tried to keep them together without success. That was never my job either.

I found a quote by LaToya Jackson that pretty much sums up how I feel."I'll never stop dreaming that one day we can be a real family, together, all of us laughing and talking, loving and understanding, not looking at the past but only to the future."

Last night I had the privilege of spending some time with a friend and her parents who were passing through town on their vacation. It was fun catching up and more fun meeting her parents for the first time. While listening to the stories being shared I again realized just how much I have missed out on during my life. They have a large family who really care about each other, headed by a fantastic gentleman with a great memory. It reminded me of a Chinese Proverb that I ran across, "A family with an old person has a treasure of gold".

Even though I don't have a biological family who cares I have a spiritual family who does. My current situation was expressed by my all time favorite author, Richard Bach, "The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each others life".

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