Gifts

 For the last few weeks it seems everyone on Facebook has been saying gifts of money, a new home, a new job etc. are right around the corner. I think it is really odd. It seems to be coming from everywhere. I really don't want any of that. All I want is friends and family who will talk to me.

Found but not lost

Following my intuition I was led to another bunch of photographs I had forgotten about. That makes a ton. Now I just need to know what I am supposed to do with them. Somebody must know and it would be nice if they clued me in. The pictures are really nice, by the way.

Finally

After months and months of looking at a big piece of machinery out my office window my neighbors moved it. It isn't completely out of view but at least I can now see the rest of the block and my little mountain. I just hope they aren't going to move something else in there.

OMG now the have three pieces of equipment parked in their front yard, blocking my view of the rest of the neighborhood. There must be a law!

Trash

I just dumped a ton of pictures in the trash. I went through each one, saved a few and if they didn't mean anything to me, they were dumped. Some of them were family of my ex husband. If they don't care about me why should I care about them? Anyway it felt good to get rid of this trash.

What next

I have been asking myself what am I supposed to do next. To help the cause I made a list of accomplishments so far in my long life. Amazing, but I am still asking, what am I supposed to do next. I really don't think my life is over. Here is the list I came up with to date..

Daughter, sister, wife, mother (2 husbands 3 children), room mother, Cub Scout leader, Masonic Leader (3 organizations), survived cancer, stopped smoking, columnist, Walmart demos, Good Sam employee, writer (2 hard cover books), blog writer, Facebook, bowel surgery, local writing class- children, local writing group- adults, Kindle author- 3 books, writing camp children, Foster Grandparent, Future Foundations employee, Spinal MRI, Facebook groups-3, brain MRI, Physical Therapy, Cataract surgery. I forgot I also crocheted and donated beanies to the new babies at the hospital and adult caps for the homeless.

I keep asking what is next, but so far I don't have an answer.

It's just wrong

There is so much wrong information on Ancestry.com it isn't even funny. People can put whatever they want on there and others regard it as truth. In my own case a niece showed up that I didn't know I had. She apparently didn't like the relatives she grew up with and hired someone to find something better. They picked my deceased brother, who as far as I know had one son. My nephew bought everything she said and decided to connect as a half sibling with the woman, who is 20 years or so older than he is. I would think he would at least question it. Instead, he accused me of not welcoming her into the family.

Good days and bad days

Today was a not so good day. Perhaps I was supposed to relax and didn't get the message. Several years ago I was diagnosed with spinal stenosis. One would think that would only affect the back. Wrong! At times it can affect the entire body. So days like today I just chalk up to making me appreciate the good days even more.

write a letter

I saw something on Facebook yesterday that I decided to follow. It was if you didn't have a chance to say goodbye to someone deceased write them a letter. My mother was in a coma when I last saw her. The nurse said. "tell her you love her, she will hear you". For several reason I didn't follow her instructions. She died in 1987 and it has bothered me every since. So I took the Facebook suggestion and wrote her a letter. I then rolled it up and set it on fire. Afterward I felt much better. I am not sure if it helped her, but it helped me.

Along the same lines, I wrote my daughter a letter. She had refused to communicate for 13 years and even moved to another State without telling me. I noticed that she has never changed her email address so After I wrote the letter I sent it to her as a message. Someday she will read it and possibly change her mind about me. It is the only thing I could do as nobody would give me her current address.

Following my intuition

Yesterday was a bad computer day. I evidently clicked on something I wasn't supposed to. It caused a Trojan Virus. Oh wonderful I thought. The last time this happened my son fixed it. He is not available for the next few weeks. Nothing changed what was on the screen. Well shit!

I called a friend whose son had fixed a computer problem I had several years ago. After several hours of no contact I finally reached him. Our conversation ended after he decided he couldn't fix my current problem. He suggested turning the computer off, which I did. Next I called another friend whose brother sometimes fixes computers. It was decided the computer would be picked up this morning and transferred to Albuquerque. Last night I did my best to unplug what I could. I felt I had lost my best friend because I use the machine every day.

This morning I decided maybe I should plug everything back in as I didn't know what was actually needed for the repair. I also turned it on and just for the hell of it I checked to see what would happen. I was in shock when everything came up and there was no evidence of a virus. 

At first I decided I had a guardian angel. I have since decided it was the fact that I followed my intuition, which was very strong. If I hadn't done that I would have been without my computer for an entire week.  

A voice from the past

I have been going through some things and doing some sorting. This morning I ran across this gem that appeared in the Cibola County Beacon sometime in 2000. I couldn't resist re-posting the message.

Dear Editor,

This is an appeal to the citizens of Grants and surrounding areas. Please return my first name. It is not Mrs.. It was Barbara when I was born and I need it back. Donald Gunn, a.k.a. Don or Donnie and I have been divorced since July 9, 1999.

I have lived in this town for 24 years, know almost everyone and have  two jobs in public relation fields. I would think, word of mouth being what it is, people would have noticed I am no longer married.

I would go to the top of Mt Taylor and yell, "my name is no longer Mrs.", but since my divorce I no longer yell.

I am a freestanding, self sufficient female, only responsible for myself, my dog, Buffy, who is unfortunately pregnant and my cat Cleo, who couldn't get pregnant if she wanted to.

Please, my name is Barbara not Mrs.