Memores

 Let's start from the beginning. I was bon in Ketchikan, Alaska in 1937. Everything was going smoothly. until about 1942. That was the anniversary of my first surgery. It was in Olympia General Hospital. I remember a nurse telling my mother I probably wouldn't survive.My memories of that surgery were of first of all being left outside of the surgery room by myself. Next I was moved inside and was sitting on someone's lap. I was told to decide if I wanted to go back and live my life or go with the person I was talking to. I chose to live my life.

As a result I have had 11surgries, including one for cancer. I have been married twice, neither one happy and have three grown children. Only one of them still speaks to me. I must have done something right!

The question I am asking myself today is, dd I make a mistake?  

Six Months

Today is six months since I tripped over my own feet and ended up in an ambulance on my way to Cibola General Hospital in Grants, New Mexico. I suspect I was given medication to block the pain as I have no memory of the next four days.I know I ended up in Loveless Hospital and my surgery took place on the 25th of July. I broke several bones in the original hip replacement. 

It's been a long six months, with a stay of two weeks in what used to be Good Sam in Grants and therapy at Cibola General Hospital. I still call the facility in Grants Good Sam because that's what it was called when I briefly worked there. At the time  it was my job to provide activities to give the residents money. When I quit I was told by the administrator that I had made more money than anyone else in that job.

I have to admit it was strange to be on the patient side of things. I was grateful when the day came that I was released to go home. It as also strange when it was time to do therapy several times a week at Cibola General Hospital. 

As six months since my surgery is Sunday, I am waiting to see if I will need my walker or cane anymore.

Last Day

Wow the last day of 2025. A couple of days ago a friend told me I need to keep writing because what I had to say was important to others.I appreciate her advice but I don't think so.I have written and published six books and I believe that is enough. They range from 2004 to 2023. I think I would rather just offer occasionally on Facebook.

My books have no doubt covered most of my life and I have manged to piss off most of my relatives. Not bad for one lifetime!

The only thing I haven't written is my fall last July. It landed me in another surgery followed by five months, so far, of various therapies. It is getting better and I am looking forward to walking unaided. I am at the moment cracking up over communication from my only daughter. She apparently thinks I hated myself. Not sure where she came up with that crap, but if she is passing it on to her patient I feel really sorry for them. She also thinks her brother, 18 years her senior,  is simple a friend. All I can say is if were not for his help the last five months would have been impossible. 

Well that's about it for now.Nothing else is new As I said Bernadine I really don't think I will write anymore books! 

wondering

 I am wondering how thousands and thousands of people could march in protest of Trump and he is still here? And if he wasn't? There is his VP, just as bad! Is 2026 going to be any better? I don't see how!

Dreaming

 I woke up really early this morning thinking there was a bill I hadn't paid. The thought wouldn't go away. After I got up I looked through my records to try and figure out what it was. I finally decided I had no records of paying my property tax bill for this year. I a usually very good about keeping records. I could find no proof that I had paid it or could not even find any record of the paperwork.I checked with my son to ask how I could find out if I had paid it. I called the number and ask for the record.

I had not paid this years bill and this was the last day to pay at least half. Apparently I never got the bill in the mail. Something had happened to our mail. This was not the first time either. In my opinion the person who delivers our mail should be fired or at least be taught how to read!  

Just Me

Well here I am at age 87 almost,88. I am wondering what I am supposed to do now. I have had several surgeries, three husbands (all deceased) three children, only one still speaks to me, and four grandchildren, again only one still speaks.

The fact that I am Catholic was an accident. Noting my second husband was and didn't even go to church I decided to join the church as most of his family were Catholics. Biggest mistake I ever made. It brought on panic attacks and really never fit. Previously I had been a member and presiding officer of several Masonic organizations. The office I loved was Chaplain because I always felt I was speaking directly to the Creator. This probably began as a child when I had surgery. I was picked up and carried to the lap of someone who gave me the choice of staying with him or going back to my life. I guess you know which I chose.

Now I am wondering  if I  made a wise choice as I am now trying to recover from my latest surgery. There has got to be some reason for all this. It would be nice if someone would tell me what that is. Why am I still here and what in hell am I supposed to do now?

New appointment

 Well my appointment yesterday resulted in hurry up and wait. There are only two therapy offers in the area now. Looks like I have to wait another week for an appointment at Cibola Hospital. I can't believe Good Sam sent me home with nothing except what I knew from my previous experiences.I guess I did learn a little from the therapy I had there. So time marches on- slowly! I would like to practice with a Cain while I am waiting, but I don't want to fall again and start over.